October 28 - Weird

I like being weird. Like Moss, it's all I've got. 

I just finished a lovely book called What If? by Randell Munroe, which is a series of silly physics questions answered very honestly and often hysterically by a former NASA physicist who now draws cartoons on the interweb. It is hysterical. 

To me. 

I realized that this was an important distinction - that it's funny to me - when I was describing the book to a woman who didn't seem to find it funny. It either had to be that I was describing it wrong, or other people don't find it funny that if you tried to build a periodic table of elements out of the elements themselves that very bad things would happen. The woman then said to me something along the lines of, "Oh, you're such a cute nerd." And it struck me that it is probably both - I was describing a joke badly that not everyone was going to get anyway. I'm the weird one. And I like being the weird one. 

That being said, we had a discussion in rehearsal the other night wherein we were each encouraged to share something about ourselves that may not come up in regular conversation, as a sort of bonding exercise. Other people talked about their beliefs or sexuality or traumatic experiences. I found myself thinking about seventeen things that I could share, but what came out of my mouth was that I am vegan and I am an introvert. We didn't talk further about the introversion (which I would have liked to talk about), but a few vegan jokes were made. In retrospect, I picked the wrong things to share. 

I should have said that I am a member of Mensa. Most people know I'm smart, or they figure it out after a while. I'm not sure they know how smart. And I always try to downplay it. Always. Even talking about it here feels distasteful and wrong, like I'm not supposed to brag about this gift I was born with. I memorize things fast. I learn fast. I make connections between things quickly and easily. I'm really good at most of the things I do. I have learned a lot of things in my life and retained a lot of information. But our society and our culture currently hold ignorance and youth in high regard (see Craig Fergason's piece where he claims to know why everything is messed up). So for me to talk about how smart I am...it can be an alienating thing. Something else to make me feel weird and different from those around me. So I don't talk about it much, and when it comes up, I shrug it off or downplay it. 

Well, in the name of enjoying my own weirdness, let me say, "Hi. My name is Kitty and I'm really smart. That's not a bad thing, if for no other reason, because it allowed me to enjoy What If?, which is a really lovely book."

Seriously, find a copy and give it a read. It'll make you feel smart, too. 

March 1 - Thoughts

There is always something you miss when a show is over. I will not miss the drive to and from the theatre where my current show is taking place. 

There is a lot of really amazing art out there. I hope I get to contribute to that collection. 

My friend and I were talking last night about how hormones and whatnot can change the consistency of one's hair every 5-7 years. This is probably why my hair will no longer hold a curl. 

I probably should have listened to a more upbeat song right before getting out of the car. 

Happy March! Enough with the snow already...

February 25 - Challenge

To fashion designers: If you cannot, have not, or would not wear a garment, please don't foist it on the rest of us. 

I think if they stuck to this, women's shoes and undergarments would be much less torturous. Just sayin'. 

January 18 - Question

Interesting question posed by my friend today: can a person be a critic if they don't watch the things they are reviewing "in real time?" For example, reviewing movies that are twenty years old or TV shows that wrapped three years ago. Would people read those reviews?

January 9 - Bodily Functions

Ew, gross.

No, not really.

But maybe.

Kind of.

Since I became vegan, I am much more aware of what my body is doing on the inside. I've always been pretty good with spacial awareness and whatnot, but paying attention to what's happening inside is interesting. Things like what happens when you drink too much water, or how much my digestive system hated me when I was first making the transition to veganism.

Today, all of the organs in my lower abdominal cavity seem to be staging a coup, at the same time I'm experiencing the first honest to goodness cold I've had in years. It's not pleasant. I'll spare you further details.

I do find myself wondering what is causing this coup, though. Because the entire time I was in the UK, I had no problems whatsoever. As soon as I come home and return to my normal eating habits, my digestive system hates me. Is it true that American food is so much more processed that it's hard to digest? I haven't been eating badly since I got home, so what's the deal?

This also puts the idea in my head that maybe it really is time for me to move overseas. My skin was happier there. My tummy was happier there. My sinuses were happier there. My hair wasn't fantastic, but I can play with that and find something that works well. Will they let me immigrate if I have a doctor's note saying it is better for my general well-being to live in London? Can I get a visa with a note like that?

Obviously, this is all affecting my brain function as well.

November 21 - Grumptopotomus

Imagine an octopus mixed with a hippo. Who is extraordinarily grumpy. This is the grumptopotomus.

Today, I am the grumptopotomus.

Honestly, I have no idea what that even means, but the word popped into my head because I'm really grumpy today and what's better than a grumpy hippo octopus and sometimes when you're really grumpy you just need to giggle at something completely nonsensical. So I bring you the grumptopotomus. If anyone would like to submit artwork for what the grumptopotomus might look like, I'd love to see it. Remember: grumpy. 'Cuz I can see a hippo with eight legs and a weird octopus face, but it has to be a supremely grumpy weird octopus face. Or an octopus with a hippo head that is (again) extraordinarily grumpy.

And I have now succeeded in making myself laugh so hard I'm crying, which may mean the grumptopotomus is no more. For the time being.

Send me your grumptopotomus art! Let's all have a good giggle about it!

October 5 - Mush

I have words.
To say.
About lots of things.
But not right now.
Words are failing me.
I would like to use my words.
But they are not mine now.
"I have nothing with these words. They are not mine."
"Nor mine now."
Tomorrow, I hope to be coherent.

Words.

September 24 - Tuesday

Tuesdays used to be my favorite.

Oh so many moons ago when I used to go out lindy hopping six nights a week, Tuesday night was the night to go out. There was a bar approximately three blocks from my apartment that I can scarcely remember the name of now (it has since changed owners, names, and decor) where some really awesome dancing happened. They had a back room that we would take over. Push the chairs out of the way, and cut a rug on the floor. All of my favorite dancers used to go there. It would get hot and sweaty and crowded; the men would bring extra t-shirts for when they sweated through the first one. We twirled and stomped and lindied and shagged and Balboaed and Shim-Shammed. It was glorious. Absolutely glorious. And since it was just blocks from my apartment, I could stay as late as I wanted and not worry about how I was getting home. I loved that place.

Rumors! Was that the name of the place? Rumors? Do any of my swing dancing friends read this blog who can verify that?

So I used to spend my week waiting for Tuesday to come so I could go dancing and see all of my friends. But things change, life moves on, and Rumors (if that was what it was called) closed down. The good dancing is now elsewhere on Monday nights, though I hardly recognize any of the faces I see on the dance floor now. And while I know I could dedicate the time and money to becoming a "regular" dancer again, I know that there are also other things in life that bring me more joy than the pursuit of becoming a nationally recognized lindy hopper. I just want to social dance from time to time.

And Tuesdays. Poor Tuesdays. Now they are just days to get through. A little better than Monday, not as good as Thursday. But they still have that faint aftertaste of the glorious days they once were, which makes them sadder now than Wednesdays. The day I used to love and wait for every week is now just another day, stripped of all of it's glory.

Maybe that's why I was so proud to get my tattoo on a Tuesday.

August 28 - Hair

I like my hair. Scratch that, I love my hair. It is so ridiculously soft that I almost feel guilty not letting people play with it more regularly. If I had a significant other just now, he would get to make his friends jealous with how amazingly soft his girlfriend's hair was. And it's red, to boot!

Thing is, there is always a week or two, every year, when the humidity in Chicago just goes bonkers and no matter what I do, my hair just will not behave. I get the half-frizzies, where the top layer of my hair decides to go for the Medusa look, whilst the rest of my hair just wants to chill out and hang on my shoulders. It's an odd look. Not my favorite. I generally end up pulling it back in one fashion or another to try to tame the wild and wiry fly-aways, but mostly, I just have to wait for the uber humidity to be over. The nice thing is that the week after uber humid week is generally nice and calm and I have hair so awesome, people should write epic love poems about it.

We are right, smack in the middle of uber humid week.

To try to combat the crazy today, I thought I would employ a scarf, strategically tied around my head (for a sort of headband look - none of that stupid "across the forehead" nonsense for me, thank you), and then braid it into my hair and tie it in a bow at the bottom. This is probably the most complicated hairdo I have ever attempted on a work day, and I can't totally see how it looks because I didn't do the braiding until I got to work, so I don't have the other little mirror with which to look at the back of my own head in the mirror in the bathroom. The thing is this - I have a ginormous head. And a tumor behind my right ear. Neither of which makes headbandy things very comfortable. Which means I've been sitting here with a scarf tied around my head for about six hours now, and I am dying to take it off because it is squeezing my head, but I don't want to take it off for fear of what my hair may be doing on it's own, and because I kind of want to be able to see my handiwork before I undo it.

I know, I know. Not the worst of problems. But I'll be glad when the humidity wanes and lets my hair be normal. The heat can stay; just cut back on the humidity. Thanks!

August 8 - Knowledge

I sometimes wish I knew more about how odor and fragrance actually work. Then I might be able to understand why my city has smelled like sewage for two days and why suddenly, my office smells of three-day old fish.

Somebody hid a fish in the air ducts, didn't they? Gosh darn it.

August 1 - August Projects

Rabbit rabbit!

Even though it is kind of late in the day for that. I did, for the record, say "rabbit rabbit" to my cat at approximately 12:03am, so I should be covered. I just like bunnies.

So as I have said many times, I have lots of creative projects happening in August, not the least of which is VEDA. My first video for this year has been posted if you'd care to take a look. There have been comments about me setting the bar too high or putting others to shame, and that's not what I'm trying to do. I'm just trying to create something that I have fun creating and hopefully other people have fun watching. I hope the other VEDA-rans know I'm not trying to "win VEDA" or anything like that. It's not a competition. It's a project and a community. Also, not all of my videos will be musical numbers with costume changes. Just so you know.

And tonight, I get to go to a screening of The World's End, whereat Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and Edgar Wright will all be, so I'm kind of having a super geek day. Which started with no breakfast, so it's also a bit of a weird day. Anyway.

I have too much energy at the moment for my own good, so I'm going to sign off for the time being. Enjoy your Thursday!

July 27 - Happy Happy

My youngest niece turns one today. Happy birthday, punkin'!

I also survived the filming that involved all of the words, and I think I got most of them right and in the right order and even managed to have some feeling behind them. Yay!

And I think my cat understands the phrase "move your face," which is what I say when I'm about to close the refrigerator door and he is trying to investigate the contents thereof. He does, in fact, move his face out of the way of the door. 

I hope to have words and original thoughts back tomorrow. 

July 7 - Mish Mosh

July 7 already - when did that happen and where was I? And is it true that I've only missed two days of blogging this year?

I have all of the thoughts today - about how women are represented in the media and how we treat each other and how I want to eliminate the word "fat" from my vocabulary when used as an adjective and what amazing friends I have and how I'm kind of surprised that for all of the different and varied situations in which I found myself this weekend, I seemed to get along with just about everybody just fine and I'm hoping they all walked away from those experiences with as positive an impression of me as I got from them and how silly it was for an online food ordering company to send me a coupon last week that had a coupon code that expired May 5 and whether that is a reflection on their marketing person or my postal carrier and how I may be reaching an age where I'm growing into my own beauty and how I'd really like to be reading more but you know what? It is Sunday night. And it has been a long weekend. Honestly - even Friday night feels like a year ago. So I am going to take the cop out route and tell you that I have too many thoughts in my head and not enough energy to flesh any of them out tonight while I wait for my vegan Thai food to arrive. But I did want to write something, so I wrote this.

I hope you all survived the Fourth of July shenanigans and if any of the components of my epic run-on sentence there strike you as an interesting topic for discussion, please let me know and I'll try to get to that one first.  Happy Sunday!

June 10 - It's A Cop-Out Blog!

Today is cop-out blog day! Huzzah!

The day when we all get together and just plain admit that:

1. We don't have a good idea for a topic today, and

B) They just uploaded new levels on Ruby Blast Adventures and we are completely unable to focus on anything else because as sad as it is to admit it, we've been dying for new levels for months because that fantastic crunching sound when you dig through rock is the perfect sound when dealing with an annoying day when you need something destructo-happy and it may be scary to admit it, but you're kind of stuck on destructive things at the moment after mainlining Hannibal and Whitechapel over the weekend but somehow Ruby Blast Adventures allows you to indulge in the destructo-happy without having to worry about whether or not you're going to become a serial killer or if you're going to be attacked by a serial killer. 

In short, yay for new Ruby Blast levels and huzzah for cop-out blog day!

May 30 - Punny

I had something really insightful and poignant to say today, but I have completely forgotten what it was. The memory is the second thing to go, they say.

I don't remember what the first thing was, either.

May 2 - Random

I want to spend more time around kind people.

I want to be allowed to be nice more often.

I love listening to my cat purr when I hold him.

It's really freakin' windy outside.

I had nothing really interesting to say today. I'm mostly hung up on this dream of mine that someday, hopefully soon, I'll just get to be nice to people all the time. And maybe play with animals more regularly. Or more animals regularly. The sound of my cat purring may be the best thing ever.